The Vulnerability to Manage Vulnerability

This feels like the longest January on record. LOL! I mean, I really did not arrive in 2022 with high expectations. After all, we've been duped for the last two years. I made certain to sit still, not touch anything and behave to the best of my ability. However, as my mother used to say, "everyone doesn't have home training." Which essentially means, there is a possibility for me to get ambushed while others are not operating in obedience, or for that matter care nor concern for others. Clearly everyone didn't watch Mr. Roger's Neighborhood and learned the characteristics of community - but I digress. Two weeks into February, and I almost called a "do-over," but quickly shut the thought out of my mind if it required me to do the last six weeks over. But what I've come to realize and reckon with, is that no matter what happens externally to me, I and only I can manage my response and just because there is a probability that I may get injured in the process, doesn't mean that I should not go forth and operate in my whole self. I recently told my therapist during a conversation that I realized that I expected someone else to manage my vulnerability as opposed to managing it myself. Apparently, in my attempt to recognize my vulnerability, I am learning toward managing it. As my Soror Verna would say, "Woman Down."

Vulnerability is a fancy term that simply means being emotionally available regardless of the accompanying risks. In the world by which we navigate, its' a characteristic that is moreover aligned with weakness. I would however suggest that it is in the words of Marianne Williamson, "powerful beyond measure." For when we elect to surface the innermost parts of ourselves, expecting nothing in return, we are demonstrating the availability to love and be loved. We are in fact, demonstrating the love of Christ. We think we know rejection, hurt, sorrow and disappointment - and then we look through the lens and experience of Christ and realize we are mere mortals. That doesn't however mean that vulnerability, especially amidst others, does not occasionally invoke sadness - yet it also does not mean that we should not reassume said posture.

When the posture of vulnerability weighs heavy on my frame, I take solace in Isaiah 41:10 which reads, "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." The Word of God does not tell us not to act in vulnerability, but perhaps we should first seek vulnerability in Christ before we share it with the world - because if the world (when the world) disappoints, we have a place nestled in the heart of God that will take us up, hold us close and minister to us in every area by which we stand in need.

Everyone will not recognize your strength, your greatness, your unique journey - but God always will. And it is not that God does not desire that we be in community with one another either. Sometimes, others are working on their vulnerability as well and don't have the capacity to engage properly with yours. Most of us, if we are brave enough to admit it, are doing the very best that we can. May we afford each other grace for the journey and welcome vulnerability when shown as we are entertaining a gift of love.