Frozen For My Good
Y'all, pray for your sister. I've been on the verge of speaking in other languages - and I don't mean tongues. I have been experiencing problems with my internet provider essentially since we've been sheltering in place. I've recognized that the systems are overwhelmed, so I've attempted to maintain - but as of late, it's been acting ridiculous. I had a service appointment for nearly two hours a few days ago. The technician was quite nice and before the end of his visit, we began to minister to one another discussing the goodness of the Lord. He got things aligned and I was back online. However, in less than 24 hours later, I found myself on a zoom, moving, while everyone else was seemingly frozen. When that happens, one can easily assume that they are in the right, connected and operating in business as usual - when in reality, everyone else is in the right, connected and operating in business as usual, in your absence. I've never watched the hit movie, "Frozen," but I certainly have been feeling like I'm a part of the star studded cast. As much as I've detested being frozen, it's in those times when God has spoken most pronouncedly over my life - when I'm going about my business, in my mind, amongst everyone else, when He's singled me out for a private tutorial.
In this season, it is most critical that we not rush past the lessons that God is instructing. I know I belong to the "when will this be over" club. In fact, I'm certain that I hold inaugural membership, but I'm also convinced that it is my responsibility to ascertain whatever the Lord desires to teach me and how valuable it will be in the time to come. As long as I'm attempting to keep time with everyone around me, I may miss what God has uniquely crafted for me. I know I'm not alone here. In the space of viewing just yourself moving, the imagery is powerful. We are able to see our own reflection while everyone else is immobile. God loves us so much that He allows everyone around us to continue as He beckons us to go higher in Him, connect more deeply in Him, and take our refuge in Him. Even on something as simple as a video call, He can make His presence known, show us the specificity of ourselves and allow us to see our own imperfections as opposed to noticing those of others. We may think we are in the right, that we have it all together, while God is saying, "Sorry, but you can get it right, but only through me."
Each time I connect to a video meeting and my camera is on, I immediately begin noticing the strand of hair that is disobedient, or checking my teeth to ensure that my lunch is not visible, or being observant of my environment to ensure that my folded laundry is not on display. However, while wo(man) may have interest in such demonstrations of preparedness, God is concerned with our internal representation. He desires to provide us with discernment, to see the extent to which a person's words and their countenance align. He hopes that we will be cued in enough to send a message of encouragement through the chat, or follow up with someone post zoom to check in. He wants us to bring joy with us into virtual spaces that will transform someone's physical space, and even more critically, their emotional state. And even in the brief moments of being "frozen," God can move us in insurmountable ways to do the work of the Kingdom. We are reminded in Romans 5:4, "and endurance produces character, and character produces hope." The crux is endurance. Whether we are completely cued in, or stuck in a breakout room, we must continue to complete the assignment. Sometimes we have to improvise. Sometimes we have to unplug and return. Presently, as I continue to experience internet connection issues, I am unplugging, resetting and replugging. How beautiful a metaphor for us all. Giving up although tangible, should not be our option. I strongly believe when we are at our wit's end and desiring to throw in the towel, God freezes us, to get our attention, love on us in isolation and prep us for return. Thank you God. Help us not to "let it go!" Did you see how I did that?! LOL!